A Selective Empathy

Hi दोस्तों !

Things have wildly changed probably since the last time either Anand or I posted here.
I never thought I'd ever come back here but I suddenly remembered this existed and I decided to give it a peek. I'm highly embarrassed at all the things I have posted here, but oh how great would it be to go back to a world where I posted without a care in the world and with no regard for what people thought of me.

Unrelated to the above exposition of a paragraph, I thought I'd revive the one blog where I actually posted stuff (probably because of peer pressure let's be honest) so that I can actually have some sort of opinion on the internet once again. A lot of people have in the recent past taken to Twitter for these reasons and though it's indeed quite a feat to manage to write an entire story in 140 characters, I'd like to have my own personal freedom from that word limit and be able to express freely. (Though, again, my mind wanders and I realize how insane the pressure must be to write a screenplay say - for a 20 minute TV episode or a 1.5 hour long movie that is being made from a book that was around 600-1000 pages long.)

But I'm not a writer, and as time (and this blog) is testament to this- I never worked on my prose or poetry writing or my story-telling any further. (Story-telling... hmm that is debatable, but hey! I have become a huge fan ((evidently)) of the parenthesis. What an excellent invention.) But who knows maybe in the next 10 years, this could change? Hmm.

One of the things on my mind over the past few days is this post I read about the films that won the Oscars this year. For people living under a rock, the Korean film 'Parasite' won best director and best overall film while the film 'Joker' won best actor. The reason I brought up only these two films is the point of this article.

Recently, a Facebook friend of mine wrote his opinion about these two movies in particular and said he was getting tired of films making him feel hollow inside as he left the movie hall. He was tired of movies not making him root for the main characters, because he had no empathy for them because they were pieces of shit, and that he was hoping they'd die so that the movie would end.

This was kind of a jarring opinion to digest because I personally LOVED the film 'Parasite' and although I haven't seen the film 'Joker', I am an ardent follower of the DC universe and simply love the depth of character afforded to all the villains that share that world. I read and re-read that entire little rant, and was trying to look at it from the perspective of the writer.

I am entirely for the notion of trying to see things from another's perspective. I have tried over and over again over the years to open my mind to a bunch of things that I thought was not my thing- metal music, the cartoonist Crumb, David Lynch films... just to name a few. Over time, David Lynch has slowly inched his way to my list of personal favorite directors (and although I cannot say the same for metal music and the cartoonist Crumb- I know and can appreciate the kind of musical prowess that goes into the making of metal music and the kind of skill that goes into the pornographic imagery of a cartoonist like Crumb.)

The more times I read that rant, the more I understood what he meant by it, for sure. For some people, cinema is a release. People want to go to the movies to forget. The world is a slimy, gross place and some people want to go to the movies to escape it- to be freed from the burden of seeing gritty dark things and to also escape into the life of another likable human being. For many people, this likable human being needs to be someone who they consider above their own selves, someone who can clearly be visible as the better person. However, the moment the time comes for these people to put themselves in the shoes of someone who they consider a 'worse' person than themselves, or a 'less likable' person- it gets harder for them to be empathetic towards them.

And why not? This is actually a regular and almost too human of a thing. This little article from this point on could go in two probable directions. I could talk about the responsibility of films to feed into this feel-good feeling that people need in today's world of dwindling values and happiness, or I could get into the other side of this- the empathy we lack towards the 'lesser human'.

No points for which direction this article is going to go in.

For one, what's the constituency of this 'lesser human' and how can one decide who or what this person is? How can one decide who falls into this bracket of an awful person and who does not?

If we consider the movie 'Parasite'; the movie was pointing a finger of blame at the economy and the rules of society, and was a direct interpretation of the phrase 'society makes a man'. The protagonist family in this film are not the 'good people' because the things they did to get their way were in no ways legal. But then, who were the good people in this film? Clearly it was not the rich family which was blissfully unaware of being duped by the poor family either, as they had their own vices- again a direct consequence of society and its rules. The point of this movie was to make us realise the situations that lead to people being the way they are, and the reasons they cannot escape from their reality, no matter how much they try to.

Are any of these people in any way, lesser human beings? Aren't all people what their situation and environment makes them? Is anyone born evil? Can you not be empathetic towards a criminal? Is it wrong to not want to watch the story of a person driven to crime?

Most of these questions have answers that are firmly based in subjective opinion- because the quality of empathy is entirely subjective. If you think you cannot be empathetic towards a person who has decided on a life of crime, could it be that that particular movie is not for you? Maybe. I watched Sonic The Hedgehog yesterday and one of the things Dr. Robotnik said to James Marsden's character (I already forgot his name, what was it? Tom? Not relevant.) was that he was bullied when he was little and he got his revenge on the bully soon enough. So if he was bullied- you would probably feel bad for him, but he decided to get his revenge and he grew up to be an evil vengeful villain... so is that confusing for all the empaths out there? Are you wondering if you are rooting for the right person?

'Art for Art's Sake' has for long been such a contested little saying but it makes all the difference in the world. Cinema is a reflection of humanity, and if society isn't represented by cinema- is cinema even portraying humanity well at all?

The fun thing about the world of cinema is that there is something for everyone. And maybe, just maybe, that's the beauty of it all.

What I learnt from Stanford

Stanford University. One can say only so little about the richness of its history and its exceptional contributions to society at the global scale.  

It had been a dream of mine to be a part of its richness. The first time I tried, I got on to the waitlist. Then, over the course of the past year, I realized it was what I wanted to try for again. So I did, as a transfer applicant. Though, this time, my acceptance probability was reduced significantly: only 1-2%, about 20 students in number, of a 1800 strong applicant pool are admitted as transfers. 

I just received my admission decision yesterday. It wasn't the news one would like to hear.  

A rejection letter, even so with praise, is no consolation. The decision has been uneasy to swallow. 

At the same time I have had realizations that, even though obvious at first glance, come only with stark out of comfort zone experiences. Certainly, I have been fortunate to experience these early on, and it is only just of me to share this knowledge. Just, in hope that what I share is useful to you in your future decision making, or as another view point that may help broaden your horizons.

Before I begin, let me thank all those who have given support and loved me through this phase. :)

Have faith in yourself. Know that you are a champion. And don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Each and everyone of us has the potential to do the greatest of great things. Its only a matter of self-belief that takes us to materialize this stellar potential. 

I'm not the smartest one around here. But I know I can make big things happen. And that is all that is going to help me make those big things happen.

The problem is that by the time we realize this potential most of us are not young anymore; and have fixed, sometimes inflexible, world views and values. No, that doesn't mean there is no hope for the elderly. Look at Colonel Sanders' (of KFC), for instance. But, of course, the earlier you start, the better advantage you have at creating more value out of your realized self belief.

Most people rightfully cautioned me when I shared the decision of applying to Stanford, at such odds; while some were plain hopeless. Should have I been too? No. I'm proud that throughout these two months - of application and of wait - I never once lost self belief. In retrospect, it may not have even been wise to put most my eggs in such a small basket, but we are all learning, and have the room to take such risks.... 

Take risks. If you can, take big risks. If you can't, take smaller risks. But take risks.

Taking risks puts you ahead of most risk-averse people. And most people are risk-averse. This Stanford risk - risk by virtue of time, money and energy - was a good move despite the results. The potential upsides were much, much, larger than the downside. The downside? Opportunity costs. Time, and indirectly tuition money, I could have otherwise spent in other seemingly fruitful activities. 

It is essential not just to try, but to try by taking at least some amount of risk. That makes the results even more rewarding.  Listen to your heart as much as you would to your mind. Your inner self knows what direction is best for you. Your mind does the driving.

Now that I know for sure Stanford is not where I'm headed, I can progress with full focus on my present work without any provoking distractions. Something that will be more precious than gaining admission itself.

Sometimes, things don't go your way. Its alright. Keep trying. Try for the joy of trying. Not in expectancy of the result. The journey is much more enriching and enjoyable than the destination itself. You never know what, maybe another path, you like along the way. Another path might lead you to a place better suited for you. Thus, there is hope as long as you are moving along your path, and learning with each step. Keep going.

Have you heard the incredible story of Groupon? The company was offered $6 billion by Google, just 2 years after its founding. Its founders' story is very interesting. Andrew Mason started out with a company, The Point, that aimed at inspiring social change through collective action and fundraising. All on-line. Most reputable investors thought that this concept was an epic fail. Even Andrew did not expect it to yield returns from a commercial point of view. But only because he tried, was he able to evolve The Point into Groupon. Today Groupon, based on the same "social change" model, assists smaller businesses to compete with  the big daddy's of consumer society, and mints money as it does so. 

On the other hand, there are examples of those who always tried, and were never successful. Or those who tried, and took millenniums to achieve their targets. The bottom line? Sometimes, things don't go your way. Its alright. You keep trying. Try for the joy of trying. Not in expectancy of the result. 

Lastly, rejoice failure. Smile. And move on to the next challenge. The biggest take home through this experience has been dealing with the ego. There have been moments where I have been sucked into it, and there have been others where I have been stripped off it. And the biggest positive has been that I have realized to acknowledge mistakes, apologize, and move on. You win some, you lose some. But you win all, if you learn more each time. 

If you ever have the time, look at Lalit Modi's twitter feed. Here is a man who created billions of dollars in value. Created and sustained many thousands of livelihoods. And what is he doing now? Indulging in a derogatory war of words with rivals publicly. Mr. Modi may have been unfairly ousted by politicians at the Cricketing Board in India (BCCI), but irrespective, is this what great leaders are made of? Egoism? Shameful public degradation of each other? Even though I have great respects for Lalit Modi, his reaction to criticism is alarming. 


At the same time, even though some of you may not agree, Barack Obama epitomizes all that I have had to say. He believes that he is a true champion. He takes risks. He keeps trying. And he accepts defeat in smile, and moves on.

My  own future plans. Now that Stanford is out of the way, I will continue to build on the truly wonderful opportunities I have at the University of Maryland; pursuing entrepreneurial avenues of work wherever I go: Washington DC, Costa Rica, London, Copenhagen, Mumbai, or Beijing. There is a lot of good work, with potential high returns, that needs to be done with/in the environment. I hope to continue meeting great people, learning from my surroundings, and initiating/inspiring change at all scales possible.

Statement of Purpose

Its been a while since I have been able to blog, and while my journal of ideas is over-flowing, this is one "statement" I would like to put up for reference on The Sound of Thought. This is a letter I recently addressed to folks at the Virgin group; it aptly summarizes some of the thoughts I have been jotting down over time in my journal. I'm certainly not attempting to blow my own trumpet. Instead, this is a humble attempt to use the power of the internet to share ideas and thoughts that have the potential to create strong impacts..

Respected Sir/Ma’am,

I have been invited to attend the Business for the Environment (B4E) Summit, to be held in Jakarta, Indonesia. The Summit will be held between April 27th - April 29th of this year. (Link: http://www.b4esummit.com) On April 9th, 2011, I established contact with Global Initiatives, organizer of the convention, and presented my credentials and eagerness to be the voice of the world youth at the B4E. In a very favorable response, Mr. Kisha Krishna, senior manager at Global Initiatives, extended an invitation to me as well as waived all registration fees. More importantly, Global Initiatives will give me access to a special B4E Youth dialogue with current UNDP Administrator Helen Clark.
Here is the excerpt from Mr. Krishna’s email dated April 11th, 2011:

Dear Mr Gupta

Thank you for your email and interest in our event.

We are happy to invite you to attend and cover (i.e. through your blog and other social media such as Facebook and Twitter) the event as our guest. There is also a special B4E Youth Dialogue with UNDP Chief Helen Clark and other distinguished speakers, that we can also provide you entry to.

We can waive the conference fee for you, but you would need to arrange your own travel and accommodation in Jakarta.

Do let me know if you decide to join us at the event.

Best wishes

Kisha Krishna

Manager, Partnerships and Outreach

Global Initiatives

M: +49 151 **

Sir/Ma’am, I request your office to assist me with my travel to the aforementioned event. This is a tremendous opportunity for any student of Environmental Science and Policy to go out in the open, interact with the real change-makers and important leaders. In the broader scheme of things, this event would also be an opportunity for someone, such as me, to be the voice of my generation: bold young people eager to drive change. I urge you to consider this request for the following reasons:

1.) The Business of the Environment: This conference has a very specific objective ie sharing innovative ideas that will propel business(es) in the environment. These ideas are the much needed incentives for creating win-win situations between present day environmental conditions and economic profits. This is a good start to understanding various ideas, models, and techniques for change that today’s change-makers believe in.
More importantly, I look forward to the association of the people working on the issue of incentivizing the environment - innovative thinkers, prominent business leaders, even visionary world leaders. At the end of the day, Sir/Ma’am, making an impact isn’t as much about the resources one possesses as much as it is about the people one surrounds him/herself with. As an aspiring green-entrepreneur, I look forward to initiating, being part of, and working on social-entrepreneurial ventures… that start from associating with positive people here.

2.) An ambassador of the Virgin Group: Every investment is made to obtain returns - social, monetary, or anything positive depending on the context. You too will look forward to positive returns by investing in a student’s travel to such a conference.
Besides cultivating and grooming a future leader of the environment, you would also enable me to represent your conglomerate’s ambition as a green-business leader. It is a tremendous opportunity, for an environmentally visionary group such as yours, to showcase itself through the highest stakeholders of today’s environmental decisions - the Youth. At a convention attended by Former Vice President of the US Al Gore, Former Prime Minister of New Zealand, with whom I will have the opportunity to personally interact with, leaders and change-makers alike, Virgin will have another positive footprint on the environmentally conscious world map.

3.) International experience: In December 2009, I was India’s Climate Ambassador to the prelude of the COP15 negotiations in Copenhagen. This was on a UNICEF sponsored delegation. And even though I have a lot to learn, I have the experience of being at a mega international conference. This holds me in good stead to maximize on the three days of the convention. Knowing how to interact with people, move around, exchange ideas, I know I will be able to make best use of the resources at the conference. Combine that with my passion towards my work, and I’ll certainly represent Virgin in a just way so as to make your Group proud in its investment.

4.) Passion for the Environment: Even as an enthused 15-year old back home in Pune, India, I had a motivation to work towards change. I had this sense of foolishness to dream (which I still very proudly do possess.) After multiple (some unsuccessful) tries, and the sense of learning and wisdom that one obtains through the process, I connected with two Non-governmental Organizations and formed a joint-venture between them called 'Trees for Life.' The project is in its last year of operations as of today, and we have planted and maintained a total of 500 trees atop a previously denuded hill. Through other such efforts, the partner NGO, Green Hills Group, has successfully collaborated the plantation of 2000 saplings. In totality, our efforts can be compared to, very literally, drops in the ocean. What is important, however, is that through multiple campaigns and plantation drives, we have inspired community members to come out, participate, and make a difference. We have made people aware of not only the prominent problems, but also the solutions. And my role with the Trees for Life is now over. I have moved on in pursuit of inspiring change at a bigger scale. Be it through my internship last summer, where I made a report on the possibilities of business ventures in the environment (for a private financial services company), or be it through my blogs - which relate different subjects to the environment.

Nomad on the block

After close to eight weeks of continuous activity in the College hullabaloo, a 9-day Spring Break was a much needed getaway. I took this as an opportunity to see places, both big and small, as a guest, couch-surfer, and wannabe young tourist-y investor-y man.

First stop, suburban Baltimore.

This was a good relaxing start to the travel week. My roommate, Dave, is an eagle scout - a big deal in the United States. Its positive to observe how an entire community comes out encouraging its members. From President Obama, to the Governor of Maryland, to the local county administrator, everyone sent in a note of encouragement congratulating Dave. (While in Chicago, I saw parents volunteering at schools, taking time out to coach the community-kids in activities from sports to speech.)
The best of both, communism and democratic living, have been adopted in this culture. Something practiced successfully in Scandinavian Europe. 
Also, it was rather satirical to see the Caplans' average american lives being influenced by India. Here is a family that has been in Baltimore for generations, and has nothing to do with anything outside the United States of America. But, today, the mother's work is to coordinate with her colleagues in Bangalore. Her Son rooms with a guy from Pune. And their favorite TV show is "Outsourced" - a comedy show depicting a story of the impact of outsourcing of work to India. 

I also had the opportunity to interact with my roommate's grandfather who was involved in the world war II building American fighter planes. He added that he worked for another decade or so at General Electric, building microwaves, refrigerators and appliances of the like. It felt as if he was an ambassador to the lines in history books that tell us how America transformed industry and manufacturing in the 1950s.

Second stop, New York City.

After experiencing that carrying a bag with a laptop while travelling is a menace to the shoulders and back, I decided for better, this time. All I had on me were clothes (duh?), a blazer, a pen, and a map. I was supposed to meet a friend at her UNICEF office around the UN Plaza on 42nd Street. But She sent me an email a couple of days before my departure saying that she wouldn't be able to keep the meeting. But that wasn't going to deter any of the motivation, mate. 

As I got off the bus, the close-to-zero temperatures (and rain) made me shiver rather violently for someone well-layered. So I walked down a block, and decided to fill the empty stomach with warm food and hot tea. I entered this Indian-looking cafe run by a seemingly Indian lady. Therefore, I assumed that the "Herbal Tea" on the menu would be the familiar hot Indian masala chai, or at least somewhere close. Turns out it was a Turkish Cafe, and no one had anything to do with India in there. The herbal tea wasn't Indian after all, but good nonetheless. It warmed me up, and the cold wasn't an issue henceforth.

For the next four hours, I kept walking on these streets, from Penn Station, Times Square, Grand Central Station, NY Public Library, to the UN Plaza which I anyway wanted to see. From the 42nd street down to the 14th - ah, let me be honest, I took the metro on that last leg.

Honestly, I was disappointed with the City. Having always grown up with Utopian dreams of a big and beautiful New York, all it seemed like was an advanced version of Mumbai. The emotion of the people at Penn Station was the same as that of the people at VT or Churchgate. Everyone seemed to be in the same hurry. The air, strangely, smelt the same. The people looked the same. Only, the buildings were taller, traffic better controlled, and the Indians more courteous. 

Alas, I did want to walk on Wall Street most badly, and was only 7 blocks away, but I had to catch a bus sooner than what I had booked in order to catch the metro in DC. That shuts down at 1 am, and in retrospect it was good to have taken the earlier bus. Else, I would have had to sleep at the Union Station, DC, which probably wouldn't have been the best thing to do. 

Third stop, Baltimore. The City this time. (Its interesting to note the highly distinguishable difference between American cities and their suburbs - unlike in India)

I was supposed to meet with two friends in the country side but I missed the 11:30 am train to my destination. The next one was at 5.30 pm. Instead of waiting at the station, or going back to college, I thought of checking Baltimore City out. So I took the train to Baltimore's Penn Station (hey, whats with the fascination with Penn and trains?) and my word, it is one the most under appreciated cities. Its inner harbor gives a Gulf like - Abu Dhabi, Muscat like - feeling. Walk in a block, and find yourself in the standard American downtown with tall buildings. Walk in a few more blocks and its amazing how you're confused if you were in Baltimore or Barcelona. The roads, the architecture of the buildings, and the entire feel had something European about it. Indeed, the beautiful Charm City is terribly undervalued. Perhaps because of the crime rates and large number of ghettos; nonetheless, it looks like an opportunity-pot worth keeping an eye on.

Fourth stop, Bel Air.

The logic to visit the country side was to observe the contrast between the largest and smallest. Something an Uncle of mine advised after reading my childly blog on my winter-travel: "Chicago, NY, etc are fine", he said, "see the farms, see the rural side, see the real America."

My hosts, Puerto Rican-Americans, were most homely and in fact prepared a special Indian dinner that night. Chole Bhature (Chickpeas), Rajmah (Beans), Chawaal (Rice) and Pappad (I have no idea what the English word for this is.) Added was their traditional Guacamole (like our Indian Chatni) and the meal was blissfully satisfying. The good times.
Even though this doesn't specifically relate to my being in the country side, I drove a sports car. A two-seater real deal sports car. And I'm still pumped about it. :)
As far as the contrast that I wanted to observe: the buildings weren't there, the crowds weren't there, and all those other distinct differences were obviously evident. These were what I - or anyone else - would expect. But there wasn't any subtle realization as such. However, intuitively, I'm sure I have taken something out of the whole journey.

Fifth stop, Edmonston.

Another small town, I went to volunteer at a farm here. The farm, named 'Eco-farms', is run by alumni of the University of Maryland. Here are these two social entrepreneurs, whom I fondly referred to as the solution in my Peace and Politics blog post, who are trying to develop models for economically viable organic farming. Christian, the co owner, believes that organic farming has commercial potential and deserves a much greater market share. According to him a large number of small community based farms - where the people volunteer - can do the job of increasing that market share. Christian has just started out and in all likelihood there is a long way before he successfully creates a sustainable duplicable model. But meeting him, seeing his effort and visibility of work, was an experience of good learning in itself.

Alas, Catonsville.
I got together with my fellow-countrymen, Indians, to celebrate our festival of colors Holi. Best described as spiritual and childish, we all had a good time. By the end of the celebration, we were all drenched in powdered color from head to ..... shoe. My hair had a nice mix of yellow, green and purple which I must admit looked rather cool. 


And that was Spring break. At heart, I'm not the full-fledged adventure person. But I do hope to cover ground in the coming future, learning more about life, culture, and people as I progress.

A Paradox: solved (?)

There is a lot of interest around the paradox of the Unstoppable force. In fact in the Batman thriller, The Dark Knight, The Joker says, "this [the paradox in the movie scene] is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object", referring to himself as the unstoppable force, and Batman as the immovable object.

Where can we go with this? Lets see.

Wikipedia, for instance nails the realistic possibility of such an instance saying that such forces/objects cannot exist in finite universe (click here for link)

Meanwhile, interesting videos on Youtube (link) try to argue that such forces exist, but not separately. This is what they come up with: The unstoppable force is the immovable object.

Hypothetically, consider that such a situation is realistic; and that the two entities exist separately: An unstoppable force, and an immovable object.

It could, simply, just reflect/bounce off the immovable object and continue in its path of everlasting motion. 

PS. Excuse me, for the unpardonable graphics ^_^

Chicago

10 years ago, as an 8 year old child I was fascinated by these tall American skyscrapers. They always looked as if they were pals with that seamless sky.

My father had told me this when I was 7, "Oh, America is the best country in the world." I don't remember anything else from that age other than those words of his. The impact was severe. And I'm sure he must, if he remembers, regret telling me this as I am here in this country today against his favor. :)

Things have changed; back in the mid to late 1990s, America's yearly deficits were well controlled (at a point, at as low as $0). Today, they swell over a trillion dollars, adding to the massive overall debt pile of ~$14 trillion. The might of America has reduced. Countries no longer get bullied by its gun-diplomacy tactics. The American youth is, in majority, unmotivated to be as successful as the previous generations'. . The Brazilians, Russians, Indians and Chinese (among a horde of other developing countries) all want a share in the pie. America is no more #1 in everything.

But, I await to experience my childhood fantasy. Of being in these cities, and straining my neck to see the top of tall buildings and still not being able to fit the entire picture in one frame. 

....you may be wondering, where am I heading to?

-Not anywhere much, intellectually. 

Be it on Google images, Michael Jordan's basketball team, or car-racing on the shitty video graphics of Midtown Madness. I have always been awed by the metropolis of Chicago.

Today, I booked my tickets to land in, what I had fascinatingly come across, in grade 5, as the world's busiest airport, Chicago's O'hare airport. 

I know not what awaits me; most probably, deathly freezing winds. But I feel those butterflies in my stomach as I wait for the 21st of this month, to see my childhood fantasy come alive. 

The Poona Blind School

Its the hard truth - in India, without influence, its not easy to get things done. For a simple act, such as this, I was shown the door twice: once by the principal, and then by a social activist (who I'm sure had nothing to do with the administration of the school, but was just throwing his weight around.)

However, once serendipity was by my side - things just flowed like silk. And I was there. With these bunch of positive humans! Who have all the talent, humility, goodness and the flame to do something despite their limitations. Despite being visually impaired, they have the hunger to succeed. Which is a great lesson for anybody who has the luxury of basic necessities in life! It certainly was for me.

Our team of three - Ishan, Abhishek and me, arrived at the school at a little before noon with absolutely no plan in mind for the session that we would do with these students. It was a classic case of being consciously extempore. Which, I believe, worked out very well. 

A certain Mr. Mahajan took us to the dormitory. There he called, no - yelled, out to the kids as if he were their general taking them to war. "AYYYYE CHALA CHALA CHALA. PUDHE GHEYU. CHALAA". There was, however, a kindness in his yell. The group self-assembled themselves. And our threesome was guided by these lively guys to the recreational hall. 

Here, we thought we should begin with ice-breaking and we began talking to to each one of them. Asking their names. What IPL team they support (and those who didn't root for the Mumbai team, received some gentle leg-pulling from the Shiv Sainik in me! Ha ha)

This very sincere looking guy, Shankar, volunteered to sing for the group. And his voice had an emotion at least I hadn't heard live before. It was, unflatteringly, simply outlandish.

One dude Mahesh, was wearing stylish clothes that made him stand out (yeah, like a complete dude!). I complimented him (and everyone who I could) on that and, wow, what a beaming smile each one of them have! Like, its made their day. It felt so good. We took all of their hands to shake. And taught them to shake it firm, like men. Great ice-breaker session!

So the singer, Shankar, took us to the music room (as some of the rest wanted to go for a swimming session that a group of German volunteers had organized for them.)

They have a way to communicate with people. They stick to them. In the outside normal world, gestures like these will be considered atrociously indecent. However, with these guys, it didn't feel odd at all. Some of them were stuck on to me. Their hands were their eyes. The rest were with Abhishek and Ishan.

In all, it was the three of us and this group of boys - Sachin, Ankush, Madhav, Abhijeet, Harshad, Pravin, Rishikesh, Sandeep, with their Sir, BK (Bala Kamble). We had a good time listening to their soulful music. They used harmoniums, tablas and the bongo. After each music piece of theirs, the three of us showered them with chants of "Awesome, dude, Awesome!". It was warming to see, every instrument in the room had been donated by someone. A small act of kindness making a difference! 

It was also interesting to learn how they played the game of cricket. Conventionally, there is a bat and ball. The ball is chucked, and you have to smash it with the bat. For them, its a different ball game altogether? However, with their inherent spirit to fight, they play the sport by putting on these dangler like objects on the ball so that using their sense of sound, they can connect it to bat! Amazing, ain't it?

As the whole thing was approaching an end... I took over and we had a discussion on football. It was great to see the fanfare for the beautiful game! We ended up talking about Brazil. And I made them do a small Brazilian dance - O Yapo O YaYa ae ae ae. Which gave us all a real kick!
Their voice made me believe, our aim had been accomplished. Our team had given them reasons to feel good about life!

Some of their eyes made me scared, some made me think, some inspired me. It felt great to be hugged by so many of them.
I thought we'd take 30 minutes. But we ended up spending hours.

Here, I'd like to give a special mention to the group of German friends, as the boys called them. These are foreigners, in an unwelcoming environment, they have striven to make a difference. And they have done it! On a little tour of the premises, we were shown this tree-house that the German friends had designed and built. They have been regularly coming down every day of the week, for the past year, taking the blind kids for swims, talking to them, teaching them to speak fluent English and German, and so on! They are the real heroes. Salutes!

Ode to the HP Cylinder Man

Yep It was time now.
The month was almost up.
Mom said CIAO!
But I’ve just given up!

She had left she was gone,
Now I was alone.
I heard his bicycle trample the lawn,
GREAT! He can’t even phone?

There he was Oh there he was,
The HP cylinder man!
He comes on his cycle every month,
Twirling his moustache!
Ugly-OH SO UGLY! From his head to his foot!
You can chance one- but the 2nd time- YOU CAN’T EVEN LOOK!

He knocked on the door and Yelled GAS WALA! Continuously,
I-completely green now- ran down to attend the door.
I tried to close my eyes, but couldn’t do that assiduously,
It was too much to bear man! I was totally floored!

“Toh tum ghar pe akeli ho?” he said with a smirk.
The hair at my back stood on end, as I turned to face him.
“Haan toh?” I said with my best attempt to sound brave,
“Gas kaha hain maaloom hain?” was what he had managed in the interim.

“Vaise bhayya- ise gas nahi CYLINDER kehete hain!”
He stopped aghast-wondering what in the world had I said?
“Haan kya? Par ispar vaise GAS likha hota hain!”
“Haan-par who isliye kyunki usme gas BHARA HOTA HAIN!”

He reeled with shock at this sudden revelation,
I started with surprise as he almost dropped the full one!
“maine kabhi apni life mein bolne ki galti nahi ki!” he cried.
Then he looked at me- as if convinced I had LIED!

“Maine bhi,” said I with sudden calm,
& he smiled YES HE SMILED- thanked me- and went his way,
I wondered then- wondered almost in alarm what made his day?
Wondered what it was- Wondered what did I say?

There he is-OH there he is!
The HP cylinder man!
He comes on his cycle every month-
Twirling his moustache!
Not that ugly now- I’m still confused as to HOW?
But now he smiles at me as if to say- WE’RE REALLY FRIENDS NOW!

The Ultimate Test of Sanity

Well here I am. My pre-boards are on- but I thought I must attend to this immediately. And IMMEDIATELY it is. Because THIS is one case in which I EXPECT people to see things the way I see them- but it just ain't happening!

The other day I came back home… all dejected and stuff (memory fails me- I think it had to do with my math marks…). When I entered it was to find Mom busy with her chapattis in the kitchen. She generally asks me "So what marks you got today?" so I braced myself. But evidently- that day- she had something more interesting chewing her grey cells. (And mind you- chewing STRAIGHT THROUGH in my opinion.)

She merely said- "I think a surprise awaits you. I don't know how you'll react- but go upstairs and look out your right window."

Well- naturally- as curiosity kills the cat- I was perplexed. I edged slowly upwards- as slow as possible. What would it be that got MOM so excited? Frightened at the thought that she's removed the vine outside my window I love so much- I opened my window.

At first- I didn't notice anything. Nothing had changed. I shrugged. There's got to be SOMETHING now that Mom's mentioned it! But nothing that I could actually see- so I decided to go down and consult her on what exactly she was talking about. As I turned to go- my eyes fell on my neighbour's backyard. (pretty normal see.) I noticed the normal swing they had put up… the huge palm tree in the side… many additions of new pot plants by Aunty next door… and then- I stopped. Stared. And I couldn't believe my eyes.

There were two white birds- the type with webbed feet and white plumes- frolicking about in their backyard. My eyes (I think) were the size of dinner plates.

I ran down. "Were you talking about-" Mom-"So you noticed our neighbour's new pets did you? I was thinking of coming up myself and pointing them out. I thought you wouldn't see them." "But… but…", I stammered," They can be seen from the MOON!" Well yeah technically. Who wouldn't notice two GEESE in someone's backyard?! "THAT'S NOT NORMAL!!! THEY'RE ABNORMAL!!" I said. "And why would that be? It's perfectly and simply their choice what they want as a pet- be it a goose or a mongoose." Said Mom.

Mom didn't see eye to eye with me on this topic hereafter.

They make quite a lot of noise. I've seen them shitting in the small inflateable pool that the neighbours have provided for them… they look like they're hungry all the time. And they kind of freak me out.

I asked my kindly neighbour- "why do you have geese in your backyard man?" And my kindly neighbour replied- "Because we bought them."

Now this case has become a test of my sanity… I think either I'm losing my marbles- OR (the more likely option) EVERYONE ELSE IS.

Isn't there ANYONE around who agrees with me and thinks it's abnormal to have geese in someone's backyard??

I rest my case.

:P

CLASS DISTINCTIONS? You serious?!

Once again I embark upon an amusing recollection from my Mary’s days. (I sound pretty old talking like this… :O) Any which way- 13 years in an all-girls school!! Must have been tough huh? Well truthfully speaking-ot quite.

As I thought about Mary’s this time- I remembered a very amusing fact. Though our school looked “almightily” proud and arrogant and united on the surface- we were well divided underneath. I mean every school has their stomachful of groupism- but in Mary’s- we actually had social distinction! I hence began to think of on what basis we were divided.

At the top rung of the “social ladder” if my memory doesn’t fail me- were three big groups. One which I can refer to as the “TEN A” group- consisting of Ridhi Vaid, Mrinalini Shinde, Antara Jha, Sayee Avhad-just to name a few. The second- a rather well known infamous little group I daresay- the LG (Lip Gloss) a horrid nickname given to the girls who were absolutely POSSESSED by the fact they have to look good even if there are no boys around to show off in front of [NO OFFENSE MAN-I just think there was no point. :P] The third- was the “TEN B” group consisting of Alisha Thadaney, Shweata Sharma, and the likes. Anyone who wasn’t part of these groups- was not “scorned” actually- but pretty much a nobody. Then there were the normal- Nerds, Part-of-the-walls… well- you know what I mean.

I was a part of a rather STRANGE group which fitted nowhere. We were the type who-on book-borrowing day of the week- would be the first in the library during lunch to make sure we get the good books first. Hence people would call us NERDS- but we weren’t- because the books we read were mainly fiction. Then- we were the ones who took part in each and every competition that happened- be it debates, extempores, dances, singing, one act plays, story writing, the list is endless. Hence we could be termed as the Bootlickers. But then again- we weren’t. There was ALSO one time in the 10th when- before one of the million exams we had- our esteemed peincipal called upon Tista (a friend in my group) and me to come on stage because we had OUR BOOKS IN OUR HAND [a dumb reason to start with….] And on being asked why it was so- Tista and I had laughed in her face and gone “THEY DIDN’T FIT IN OUR BAGS!!!” So nope- bootlickers didn’t fit either. Tista Tara and I were also in the hockey team- nope not nerdy man! But yet- I could tell we were looked down upon by groups 2 and 3 (group 1 being friends with us…) You know the general- they have glasses- they laugh at CLEVER things- they don’t talk to us- They think they’re too great- they think reading a couple of books makes them smarter than us- they think looking good ain’t important…bla di bla!! We didn’t pay much heed to them anyway.

This one’s to all the kids suffering because of this dumb issue- take a chill pill- there is someone like YOU out there- who has glasses, loves reading and doesn’t need the mirror quite so often! Find them and befriend them!

When you have it- you hate it. However- it turns out to be the first thing you miss when it's GONE

Neighbours. What do we think of them? If you were mom and you saw a neighbour passing by- you'd say "Aa ja! Chai peeyegi?" and spend the rest of the evening chatting merrily. If you were dad in the same situation- you'd step out of the house and talk for 5-10 minutes about the re-making of the society road or the stock market. If you were ME in the same situation however-you'd either blatantly ignore your neighbour, or give him a nod of acknowledgement- or maybe a wee smile saying you know him- and it passes. Yes folks-I'm a sinister woman who's been MEAN to her neighbour. I admit it.
It started 4 years back. When I shifted from my old home to my current- I didn't even know what owning a row-house meant. When I got here- I saw that technically it was one big bungalow divided into two- one half is yours- the other your neighbour's. One fine evening- Mom and I went to meet them. Well-perfectly NORMAL evening for all those dramatists out there expecting a storm or some other harbinger of doom! The door was answered by a sweet Parsi Lady who looked like she always had a smile plastered on her face. I swear I'll NEVER forget Aunty's smile. And yeah- behind her was her fair, same height as me, full of baby fat son. That was 8th man- we played merrily together for 2 years after that- be it football, chor police- ANYTHING.
10th- we hardly spoke much- even if we did- it was through the net.
Me and Mom in backyard. We hear an AMAZING OUT OF THE WORLD howling. Me: Have the wolves started rounding up on us??
LOONELY!!! I'M MISTER LOONELY!! I HAVE NOBODY.....
Mom: It's your sweet neighbour... HELLO!?
(He pops his head out) He: Yes Aunty?
Mom: You sing.... very well!!
He: (clearly pleased) THANKS AUNTY!
(goes back and continues) I rolled my eyes.
Sarcasm clearly dripped off him.
Thereafter we were subjected to concert after concert of his expert bathroom singing.(row houses have common ducts...) which was- annoying- yet entertaining!
Then it happened. Aunty fell ill. Her foot had been cancerous-so they had gotten her leg amputated- and she had been living on a plastic foot. Suddenly the cancer had begun to spread again. She was hospitalised, put on chemo, and my parents went to visit her often. I then realised that- I had never given my neighbours a second thought. Taken them for granted. I began to think of her every day and night, and even though I'm not religious, prayed piously for her daily. That's when it hit me- the awkward shy bathroom singer boy that I had for a neighbour- was actually THE BRAVEST PERSON I HAD EVER MET.
Mom told me how he had to bathe his mother sometimes. How he cookes anda burji for him and his brother. (which I am thoroughly INCAPABLE of without major threat to myself and my surroundings...) Thinking of this now makes my hair stand on end.
And then she just.... died.
We didn't speak at all. Maybe I didn't know how to break the ice- and neither did he. Whatever be the reason- it still is like that. His younger brother was affected severely- as he began failing in school. As for the older however- we were in 10th- he tried his hardest to give the Board his best shot- and got 78. I think he's a genius. I personally- would have failed.
11th- he went to boarding. It's funny how you hate things when you have them- and miss them as soon as they're taken away. One thing I know- I would never have been able to say this to his face. I am feeling MUCH better after writing this.... I guess that's what blogs are for huh? :) :)

A Small Introduction with Some Food for Thought

Well hello. I am a “new addition” to this already pretty interesting blog. I’m Soumya Iyer- and I guess I’ll be giving in some of my viewpoints here too.
We write differently- Anand and I. While he will be discussing more of global issues which affect us directly or indirectly, I can discuss things which affect us more personally.

Well- to start with- I received a pretty bad result in a Physics exam today (not that I blame anyone….). That got me round to thinking about examinations themselves. WHOA! Who even came up with this bizarre idea to test knowledge?!

Be it LKG or PG class, there is no escape from the tyranny of examinations. As Winston Churchill has summed up, “The pupil would be pleased to display his knowledge, but the examiners are always inclined to expose his ignorance”. This clearly explains the dual purpose of examinations doesn’t it?
Learning is a continuous process which needs consolidation at regular intervals. Hence the periodical tests and exams. When a number of credits are earned, the student is elated; while the record maintained shows the progress he has made. If on the other hand, enough number of credits are not earned, the student is frustrated, and finally he/she may drop out or fail to get the degree or qualification. Easy-peasy what?
There are of course- other examinations which aim at filtering away as many as possible and selecting only a cream of candidates that suit their special needs. (IIT-JEE would be a brilliant example of that!) They are- in my eyes- like the merciless cut-throat (literally and figuratively!) knives of a butcher!
Whatever be their purpose, examinations are- as a not-really-passed but widely accepted rule, a bitter pill for students to swallow. But until and unless we find an alternative, they have got to stay and assess students’ performances. The student community of course, does not look upon exams as as essential component of the scheme. This develops phobia and THIS manifests in many highly amusing and pretty hilarious forms like MALPRACTICES (in layman’s terms: CHEATING!). The duty of the examining bodies here- is to make the exams less frequent and more agreeable; and the evaluation less subjective and more unbiased.